I spent more time than I care to admit at the Sigma Nu house during college (given my advanced age, one can assume that this was BEFORE they were shut down permanently). That place was a pig sty. It was really disgusting, but every single one of those frat brothers would brag incessantly about how theirs was the only frat house west of the Mississippi with an indoor swimming pool. I would have sooner gone swimming in the toilet of my local Chevron before I would have gone swimming in that stew of who-knows-what. Those guys were totally deluding themselves about how awesome their house was.
As it turns out, so am I. I pride myself on keeping a clean house, but the following incidents have all occurred in the last twelve hours:
*Said, "Where the heck did these underwear come from?" as I strolled through the family room.
*Told Kiki to throw her string cheese wrapper away. She looked at me blankly, dropped it on the ground, and strolled away casually.
*Watched as my two year old slipped on semi-coagulated dog saliva and face-planted.
*Listened as Kiki made a huge fake burp and said, "Like that, Dad. Like THAT."
Sometimes I wish I had a maid so that when crap like this goes down there's a third party to blame.
Mona 5th Ward primary families
9 months ago
6 comments:
Hey, I found this card that shows a polished mother giving her child a sip of milk, with a word bubble, "Run along now, and remember you'd die without me." Maybe she'll make it to her teen years . . .
Sounds like you just have a frat girl...Kiki. Kate's name didn't seem to come up much in this post. You are definitely headed for a world of hurt with that one. I let you know how bad it is with Leighton so you can at least be prepared.
I swam in that pool, but hazing was involved.
P.S. I have a cleaning helper and there isn't anything worse that having her show up and then wanting to crawl in a hole and die because you know that she is actually going to witness first hand the level of filth.
Please don't blog about my house anymore!
Great post, that's how I feel here sometimes too. Thank goodness we don't have dogs, I can't quite hack the dog drool part. Yuck. Isn't there a high-schooler who could come in one afternoon a week and help out? I do that in the summers and it really helps. Maybe someone would swap piano lessons for free cleaning...I've done that too.
I'm looking for someone else to blame...I would like to accost a maid for the level of disorganization and grime. But like Rose, I too would be mortified if someone else saw all of the built-up piggieness.
Thank goodness I don't have a pool!
Post a Comment