Barratt Cousins: Now It's Your Turn...

First, let's take a moment to remember Grandma and Grandpa.

We had so much fun with them.

The Quiz Begins:
What were these matched sets of superhero underwear called?

Name the flasher.

Who are these trained killers?

Essay Question: WTH is going on here?

Whose wedding? Why are we all wearing knee socks?

Let me know how you did!

What Goes Down While I'm Busy Canning

Kate: Another day of total neglect, isn't Kiki?
Kiki: You better believe it. Hey, I didn't know you could read. How about you try to stimulate my brain in some way before bedtime?
Kate: Well, ordinarily I'd love to, but since I had 70 EL Fudges for lunch I'm finding it a little hard to concentrate.
Kiki: You had lunch? I haven't had a square meal since the fruit starting coming on.
Kate: Let me dump out the entire contents of the playroom. I took a mental note last year and made myself a little stash of fruit snacks for this year. If only I could find it. Well, I've got a few totes left full of legos (crashing sound)...there. That should do it. Everything I own is out. Still haven't found those fruit snacks though.
Kiki: Who's that guy on TV? Maybe he could help us.
Kate: D**n straight we should call Dr. Phil. And if SOMEONE could get me to kindergarten on time so I could learn my numbers, I'd know what to dial.
Kiki: You think you have it bad? I had to carefully spread this blanket across the ground hoping that if I tripped our mom, she'd be eye level with my diaper that's hanging down to my knees. I'm carrying around my own "quart jar" here, if you know what I mean.

Kate: Forget it, I'm going to bed. I'll tuck you in if you'll tuck me in.
Kiki: Don't forget to pray- we won't survive the fall without divine intervention.

Exactly. My. Point.

I was reading Kate the riot act about her messy bedroom. She has a playroom, so it's an absolute mystery to me how a room with NO TOYS in it can become such a complete pig sty. I railed on, and she replied,

"I don't know what you're so mad at me for.

All I ever do around here is watch TV."

First Day of School! First Day of School!

It's an obscure "Finding Nemo" reference, in case you missed it. If you have seen the movie, let it be known that I am a "Marlin" all the way. "She seems too little to go to school," has been about all I have said lately. Not in front of her though, as I try to keep from being a complete idiot. I have been somewhat taken aback by my level of emotion about my little Kate heading off to kindergarten- I've cried at random, I've worried myself because she doesn't know anyone in her class, I've considered every possible "what if" and worst case scenario. To Kate's credit, she has been incredibly excited; the only momentary moment of panic was when Walmart ran out of glue sticks. So, against my better judgement, Bruce and I dropped her off this morning. I didn't cry. Kate was so happy to be there that I just couldn't do that to her. It would have only confused her as to why I was so sad when she was not.
Some friends in the neighborhood knew I'd need a little distraction this morning, so we rounded up our kids and went to breakfast. Kiki was a little punk. When Kate was getting ready for school Kiki said, "I want go to school. Where my backpack? I want go to school." Then when Bruce left, she said, "I want go to work with Daddy." So I told her, "Kiki, you and I get to go to breakfast!" and she said, "I want stay home."

I had a mini-reunion with my two best friends from high school, Anneliese (left) and Stacie (center). It has been so much fun! I marvel at the many years that have gone by, and we've lived our seperate lives, and yet as we've hung out the last few days we found we still have so much in common. We have laughed and reminisced and just gotten caught up. Anneliese lives far away, but Stacie just moved in close to us, so I'm really excited about that.

Bruce took the girls to a Daddy/Daughter Day at Mutual Dell.

Kiki was WAY into it.

I think Kate had more fun though.

Bruce's parents headed home last week after a fun visit.

Paul and Ruth celebrated their 49th wedding anniversary while they were here. I wish I knew their secret. Of course, I probably won't ever have a 49th wedding anniversary since Bruce would have to live to be, like, 117 or something for that to happen. (Just kidding, babe. Only 92. Don't be mad.)

Janet and I have been canning and canning. We got off to a rough start. We started out making peach slices, but then decided to make peach jam, so we had to switch gears for that, and so 4 hours into our first major canning session we had 4 PINTS of peach jam to show for it. It was a little demoralizing, but we've since got the routine down, and our spirits are back up.

Our batch of jam took 17 1/2 cups of sugar.

I was appalled. No wonder jam is so good.

Here we are at work.

Kiki has exchanged the bikini for these princess pajamas. It's a similar level of obsession but at least we've got a little more coverage. Let's breathe a collective sigh of relief.

How I Feel About Powder

She's a good dog, she really is. Look how nicely she lets me put pig tails on her.

However.

I took her to the vet this morning because she had an ear infection. The vet laid on the guilt since we had not been in for an exam in a couple of years. I was nice but I gave it to him in "vet speak" as in, "You are barking up the wrong tree."

She is well taken care of. She eats, sleeps, and plays. We take her on walks. She has her favorite shady spot in the yard. We protect her with a fence. We paid $800 to have her knee replaced a couple of years ago. I just fail to see the need for $350 in diagnostic blood work on a yearly basis when she appears to be healthy merely to see if anything is wrong with her. She is 10. Of course there are things wrong with her, but what good could come of knowing? There is not much you can do for a 10 year old dog- if her kidneys are failing, then Powder should make tracks for the white light. She's had a good life.

I do not feel that my attitude makes me a negligent pet-owner. In the interest of full disclosure, anyone who knows me knows that I don't really love Powder, but if it's any comfort to you, she doesn't love us. Seriously, she doesn't. There's an affection there, but she would happily live with anyone who remembered to feed her, let her out, and offer the occasional belly scratch. Am I a bad person because I missed a few check-ups? I think (and hope) not.

I'm A Guest Blogger...

Check the link on the right for "Ride the High Plateau" to read some of my thoughts of late (as well as the thoughts of a sheep dog and a stuffed lamb, so I'm really in my element).

Calling all Judd's: Let's test your knowledge.

Take My Quiz!!

Name the horse.

How did I break my arm? What did we call the white dog on Merrilee's left?

For extra credit, What was her REAL NAME?

Why is Grandpa wearing underwear? What was this van called? Who is behind the wheel?

Is the gun real? What sicko gave us these sweatsuits? Why was Liza the only one who had the common sense to feel ashamed?

Where are we? Identify 10 of the 12 people in this photo. Comment and let me know how you did.

Do you like my quiz? Thank Uncle Jack for his tireless photographic efforts over the years. And for my Barratt cousins- your turn is coming....don't be jealous.

Are You Sure I'm the Father? I Could Have Sworn I Used a Condiment.

One of the first things I noticed about Bruce's family was their love of condiments of all varieties. Spices, ketchups, and mayos of all kinds are well-utilized. I knew I had seen how others lived when I saw Bruce's dad squirting ketchup into chicken noodle soup. It was a hard moment for me- I can't stomach bottled ketchup. For some reason packets from a fast food restaurant don't bother me, but cold ketchup from my own fridge makes me gag. I think it has something to do with the coagulated bits that inevitably crust around the lid.

One of the fundamental disagreements in our marriage has been about the treatment of meat. We agree that one should eat it, so at least we have that binding us together. Bruce falls into the camp of marinades- steak sauce, brown sugar, garlic, teriyaki, vinegar, BBQ, lime juice, frankly it just doesn't matter to him as long as at least a dozen items from our cupboard and fridge have been dumped into a ziploc. I'm a purist. I've lost count of the number of times I have said this exact sentence: "You know, Bruce, I just really like my meat to taste like MEAT." A little salt, a little pepper, and that is all that is necessary. I like to taste chicken when I'm eating chicken, and beef when I'm eating beef.

I guess you can tell who Kiki belongs to.

There is a single egg under that massive pile of ketchup.

Go ahead, blame stocky calves, sarcasm, and atheism on the Barratts. However, ketchup worship falls squarely on the shoulders of the Hatch family.

Pleasant Surprises

I complained to Bruce, "I'm sick of having to suffer through something to get a blessing. So what that our basement is all new? We had 3 floods this year alone. I don't care that I have a good job- I wish I didn't have to work at all. I don't want my blessings coming to the back door anymore. I want them to just show up on my front step for the taking."

Then guess what happened? Bruce won $2000 in free flights at work. So the moral of the story is: If you complain and are ungrateful, then God rewards you.

On the serious side, I really have found myself in a little slump lately, and I have been kind of negative. So I gave myself a talking-to, and now I'm ready to be more positive. Here's some good things that are going on for me:

-I have picked up 10 new piano students without even trying. My schedule has filled in perfectly, I had a bunch of people switch to mornings, and my income is going to just about double and I am still only working 2 afternoons a week. As far as jobs go, one where you set your own schedule, don't have to dress up, and don't really answer to anybody is about as good as it gets.
-Kate got a cute haircut. She has been on "Hair Strike" for months and I was really starting to sweat it with school starting in a few days. But now, with the new haircut, she has decided that it would be a good plan if we blew her hair dry every night after her bath, then flat-ironed it in the mornings. This is serious progress for her.
-We went to the dentist and had no cavities.
-It's almost time to start canning fruit. It's kind of like the first snow- it's exciting the first few times, it really is. And I like feeling like I've done something industrious.
-We are planning a fun vacation to Oregon in just a couple of weeks. I am so excited.
-We met Kate's new kindergarten teacher. Her name is Mrs. Walker and she seems extra nice. Fingers crossed for school success, please.
-My sister made a surprise visit with her husband and kids. Elise and Kate had their last partysleepovertimeoftheirlives before school.
-We went on a fun picnic with Jack and Porter to the splash park.
-And lastly, I have a couple of new blogs I've been thoroughly enjoying (read: wasting tons of time on): http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com, and http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com. Prepare to be delighted.

See, I have lots of things to think good thoughts about.

Taking Action

Probably the only downside to my summer of guests is the fact that my good eating habits totally fly out the window. I'm feeling squishy and yucky and other adjectives that end in "Y." (excluding "Skinny," of course.) I've formulated a plan-

The Affirmative Action Diet.

No Whites Allowed.

It's not that there's anything WRONG with you, white flour, white sugar, and white rice. It's just that WHEAT has historically been under-represented in my diet, and this plan is necessary for social justice. It's not that you're not good enough, Whites, it's just that the Wheats are equally good, and they could really use a leg up. I plan on consuming you, Whites, in a proportion that is somewhat relative to your representation in society, but I also feel that you have belonged to the "Good Ol' Bread" club long enough. It's time to make things right. Don't feel bad, Whites, I still love you, I just have these darn......quotas. There, I said it.

Grandma Go-Go: A Quiz

Which is louder?

A. The shout of joy Grandma makes when anyone anounces a pregnancy?

B. The silent approval received when anyone loses a few pounds?

C. The screams of dismay when my brother Dave told her, "I'm gay." (He was joking.)

D. The loud sighs of relief when her grandchildren FINALLY get married.

Judging by last night- D.

TJ and Randee tied the knot at a beautiful wedding in Pleasant View last night. Aren't they a lovely couple?

The Johanson Girls.

Amy, Lyndzee, Leeanne (due in just a few weeks!), and Ashley

Suz and Me.

(I'd thought we'd have the craziest hair there, but know what? We are AMATEURS.)

Cat Away Mice Play

While I was in California, Bruce was too. He was in Lake Tahoe for work.

He certainly appears to have worked quite a bit.

I mean, the stress is palpable, really.

Kate and Kiki spent their time...

...practicing piano...

...and doing arts and crafts...

...so it's obvious I had to make up my absence to them by taking them to the Bean Museum yesterday.

Grandma and Grandpa came too, but they were behind the camera for the day, so no photographic evidence exists of the super awesome time they had with us.

I'm back in Kiki's good graces after my absence. Tonight she said, "Mama, you cuckle (cuddle) me."

My Mini-Personal Vay-Cay

Thanks to my in-laws willingness to babysit and some unused Southwest credits, I was able to "escape" for 48 hours to see my old college roommate, Sarah. It's pretty incredible that I have stayed friends for 17 years with someone I was randomly assigned to be roommates with in 1992. She and her husband live just outside of San Francisco. One of the first items of business was a little shopping at the outlets by the airport, and pedicures. We picked the same color.

My break was quite heavenly. We went on a long walk every morning, went shopping, ate lunch out, and saw "Julie and Julia." It was a good movie- I recommend it to all females. I don't think Bruce would like it, so it was perfect that I got to see it with a girlfriend. All in all, it was a very relaxing time.

Sarah agreed to be the official photographer of the trip. We had to use the remote setting on her camera, and she MAY have zoomed in a little too much...but here we are looking just like we did in our college days. Or not, but no college GUY we knew at the time was looking at our faces anyway.

This shot we finally figured out the remote AND the zoom.I was a little worried about leaving the girls, but they did great with Grandma and Grandpa, and I realize now that the time that Kate and Kiki spent with them will be a precious memory to my girls. And, they really didn't miss me- Kiki's first words to me upon my arrival home were, "Where'd Daddy go?" Oh, the daggers to my heart. And frankly, I have been stressed out and overwhelmed by my life. (That topic probably deserves its own blog posting, but not now.) So, I have returned with a bit more energy to handle some of what will inevitably come my way. It was a good trip.

Adventures Close to Home

We took Bruce's folks and the girls to Salt Lake City yesterday to see some local points of interest. We thought it would be a fun adventure to ride Trax into the city since Kate and Kiki's lifetime exposure to public transportation has been nil. In fact, Kate has actually romantacized it a little in her mind, saying things like, "I can't wait until I can ride the bus to school!"

Kiki had a great time on the train.

First stop, Crown Burger. No pictures. We were too busy consuming mass quantities.

Next stop, the Church History Museum. Kiki at the FIRST exhibit in said museum. She declared it, "BOOOORRRRRING."

Yep, still bored.

Kate, Bruce, Mom, and Dad by a covered wagon.

Below is a replica of the quarters one would have stayed in if traveling to the US by boat.
"Not bad," we thought aloud. "Oh, no," the docent corrected. "The lower bunk alone was the entire space allowed to a FAMILY." Okay, now I'm getting claustrophobic.

Kate with a boat.

The girls and I by the covered wagon. Did you know the pioneers fashioned themselves wooden odometers? I was fascinated by that. Kate and an old time band. See, the pioneers weren't all soberness and scriptures. I bet these guys could seriously shred.

"I heretofore command that the Sunday Nap is MANDATORY!"

Angels. And one little devil.

At the Assembly Hall on Temple Square.
Bruce and I totally made out hoping to get arrested, but since no one cares when straight couples kiss, we settled on taking family pictures instead.
A chase around the reflecting pool.

The girls and I.

"Kate," I asked as we rattled on Trax home, "What was your favorite part about today?"

"The place where we got the treat."

"Um, you mean RITE AID?"

"Yep. Other than that it was too many wagon wheels."